By Christopher Emmanuel
Surely the good man is the bad man's teacher; and the bad man is the good man's business- Tao Ti Ching
"I am wearing my fathers Pants." I said. Standing before the crowd at his eulogy. Yesterday I flew to Toronto to meet my mother. As I stood in the shadow of my Fathers' bookshelves at their house, I announced to my mother, "I don’t have a pair of black pants to wear to his funeral." "Before you go and spend any money, let me look in his closet!” she said disappearing briefly returning with a black pair.
At first I felt odd staring at the dead man’s pants. "It won’t fit... I am taller than him... It’s not my style..." I said sheepishly. My mind raced for an excuse. I didn’t want to be like my father. Why should I wear his pants, I thought with the last shred of resistance? "We have to go soon, time is moving on," my mother said. Putting it on, it was not only a perfect fit, it matched the jacket I bought.
Many of you might not want to be like your parents. You are not alone. As I looked at his shriveled body in the open coffin, a cascading life of memories plagued my mind. Everything is trivial looking from here. We waste time on meaningless hurts. It’s hard to believe one word or look from this now frail body. He was a man who sent fear in me as a boy. Some say, "A hard man is easy to find- A good man is harder to find." My father was both, just like everybody in different measures. Good and bad. Alright!! I'll admit. He was much too prickly to me. Like a rare rose with too much prickle, hard to hold, but a beautiful flower waiting to unfold.
Death reminds us of the frailty of life. We pass through life touching everything taking nothing. We need to be mindful of what has true meaning. Tears of forgiveness streamed into love, memories of love and hurt intermingled, unsettled emotional healing for past ignorance. After all, he was my father. We must not take things personal-it’s hard to do. We don’t know the whole truth...until face-to-face. My father is face-to-face now.
Judging a life is Gods domain. Love is all. You who carry judgment for the male in your life, condemning the past pains from a father must come to understand as I have. Forgiveness is the true freedom for unfolding love. Despite what you think, you came from your fathers seed. And like the Greatest prophet in the western world said, "Without the father I am nothing."
Your greatest adversary has the ability to release the greatest love into your heart.
I am wearing my father’s pants with pride today. I am celebrating his life. After all I came from my father's pants.
Ambergris Today expresses its sincere condolences to Chris Emmanuel and his family during this time of sorrow in their lives.
Books by Christopher Emmanuel can be purchased at his Art Gallery in The Sunbreeze Hotel , Art of Touch, Pages Book Store, Black orchid Spa and Sol Spa.