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Radical Relationships

Why is it we lose our health to gain our wealth, then use our wealth in a effort to regain our health.         -unknown

It is said that health is wealth and love is the most important aspect of life. Words are not the same as practice. Many people will say money will keep you healthy, still others say health, love and money is in a close race. Yet all the money in the world can’t stop you from death. Being physically healthy does not always make you feel love. Life is a passage to another place.

Many people worship money, ideals, things and pleasures of this life, often times before health and love. A past acquaintance of mine, loved his car so much he demanded it clean constantly. I once watched him polish the rim of his tires with a toothbrush to get it clean, yelling at his son who touched his clean polish on the hood. His obsession for his automobile I could not comprehend, though I respected his passion. Knowing that the wheel constantly contacted the road and dirt driving, my common sense kept me shaking my head in bewilderment. He had a radical relationship with his car.

Another individual claimed love for God in her religious belief, vow to have a personal relationship with the Holy Spirit and Jesus. Yet she abuses her family, constantly lording hell over them. Using the “Good Book” to control and manipulate them for her own desires. She alone knew what was right in God’s eyes. She had a radical relationship with God. Her concept of God’s love serves her and no one else.

Still another testifies love for herself. Only wear the best clothes and finest jewelry, always appear happy. But goes out to clubs almost every night, drinks to get numb and gives away her body to anyone who grabs her fancy; can’t remember the night before most days. Her life is in an endless cycle of personal sexual abuse. She has a radical relationship with herself. Her concept of a free woman in power is the source of her abuse.

Are you holding on to an ideal of love that may not be realistic? Do you feel emptiness inside no matter how much your partner says, “I love you.”? Are you looking outside yourself for love? Are the pleasures in your life destroying your health? Do your material possessions run your life? When it comes to relationships the only constant you have is yourself. Even if you love God first, the concept of love comes from yourself. Love starts and stops with you.

Considering that most of life is about how you “relate”, it makes good sense to create a radical relationship with yourself first, one that promotes health, love and joy. When you have a great relationship with yourself you learn to love and respect others by knowing the true meaning of reverence for life.

Below are some simple ways to express more self love:

Be conscious: Be aware of how your words and behavior affects yourself and others. Turn away from gossip.

Self acceptance: Know that you will experience failure along with your successes even when you are down; practice radically loving yourself by staying to the positive.

Self responsibility: Accept responsibility for your conduct even when it is a shameful and painful realization. Learn to forgive yourself and leave regrets in the past where they belong.

Self assertiveness: Know your needs and feel comfortable to express them clearly and calmly. Realize you can’t get what others don’t want to give you.

Integrity: Know your values and always attempt to live them. Keep your half of the bargain.

Excerpt from “Secrets To Life Book” by Chris Emmanuel
Book available at Chris Emmanuel Art Gallery (Sunbreeze Hotel) and Pages Book Store

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